Top 5 Wonkiest Male Celebrity Noses

Wonky nose

And now for the list!!

#5.  Adrien Brody

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      Look at his face, now look at this text, then back at his face.  Despite, or maybe because of, his nose the man is dead sexy.  Best known for his roles in various movies such as ‘The Brothers Bloom’, ‘Midnight in Paris’, ‘King Kong’, ‘The Pianist’, and many others.  Mr. Brody is constantly proving his worth as an actor.  He’s 39 years old, so middle-aged bombshells, you know what to do.  Sure, he may be seeing/dating the lovely Lara Lieto, but be honest, has that ever stopped any powerful woman in history before?  Just don’t think too much , his smoldering eyes and endearing nose will guide you through this moral dilemma of stolen hearts.

#4.  Gerard Depardieu


  Now, for you older ladies out there, about 63, this is the nose–I mean man–for you.  An internationally acclaimed and worthy French actor is all anyone should see in this man.  His nose, though, does seem to get in the way and it probably didn’t hurt his chances to land the role of Cyrano in Cyrano de Bergerac.  He’s also well known to American audiences in his role in ‘The Man in the Iron Mask’, and is famous to french students all over for his portrayal of a hunchback in ‘Jean de Florette’.  He has beautiful sparkling eyes, a wonderful French accent, French sense of humor, and just look at that distinguished nose!  Wouldn’t you just love to rub noses with that hunk?

#3.  Owen Wilson

Owen Wilson


Alright, let’s take a moment here for you to catch your breath.  I know his nose just pulled that air right out of you, but calm down.  Just in and out, doll face, in and out.  Now, back to Owen Wilson.  This is an actor I greatly admire, and he has caused the laughter of millions by such wonderful films as ‘Wedding Crashers’, ‘Zoolander’, ‘Shanghai Knights’ and others.  But he also does more serious work as can be seen in movies such as ‘Midnight in Paris’, and ‘Marley and Me’.  He’s a versatile actor who leans towards the hilarious, which just adds to his wonderful appeal.  He’s only 43, which in man/cheese/wine-age, only means he’s right at that peak and possibly getting better.  So girls, whip out those combs, untangle those scraggly locks and rush to this golden-maned man’s side.

#2.  Stephen Fry


This wonderful UK comedian has brought tears to audiences around the world–and the good kind of tears…the ones that comes from laughing so hard you’ve snotted up milk you drank that morning.  He is known in his acting career for ‘V for Vendetta’, ‘Alice in Wonderland’, ‘Black Adder’,  and countless others.  He’s done quite a lot of comedian work as well, and his books are known world-over, so you know he’ll be able to make you laugh while giving you a side-long glance over the wonked twist of his nose.  He’s about 55 and lives in London, so that’s another thing to add on your tourist list if you visit London: see Stephen Fry(‘s nose).

#1.  Cyrano de Bergerac

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Alright, alright, so I know a pulled a fast one with this one.  But I didn’t say ‘Top 5 wonkiest actor noses’, no I said ‘celebrity’, and although Cyrano de Bergerac is a literary character, he’s still famous and therefore, a literary celebrity.  But he’s one of the greatest French literary figures, and if you do not know who he is–STOP ALL FUTURE PLANS–and after reading this article, try and find a copy of Gerard Depardieu’s rendition of this classic figure, or better yet READ the play and book.  Technically, I’m cheated by inadvertently having Gerard Depardieu on this list twice, but he does a fantastic job of portraying this beloved literary French figure.  In case you don’t know anything about Cyrano (and I don’t care if you have to fly to France just to get your paws on a copy of the movie), this literary figure is famous because of his nose.  Well, to be fair he is famous because he was a great dramatist and duelist.  He loved poetry and romance.  And his tale is one of great heart-wrenching, yet up-lifting and honest tales of love, friendship, and war.  And yes, the general premise is that he’s in love with his cousin, but it was a different time!  He was around in 1619-1655 (the character’s based on a real man), so cut him a break!  Back then, cousins were fair game.  But he is also one of the more self-less class of men, and instead of telling his cousin he loves her he helps the man she’s in love with woo her.  It’s a bit twisted, now that I think about it, but it’s a wonderful story and one no one should miss out!

Anyways, now you have my list of top 5 wonkiest celebrity noses.  Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!